Richard's really rad residence

I wanted to post this on Facebook, but I felt like I was going to be dropping my pearl in front of swine, so to speak. But I hope you all like it. Plus, it's kinda weird.

Have you ever planned a dream house growing up? Guess what my answer to that question is, yes! So, I was thinking about what my dream house would be like, barring any rules or regulations. This is what I came up with.

First, I'd own a huge property, like some thing the size of Utah Valley. And it would have giant fields of grass and some forests. Also, there would be mountains. So, I guess kinda like a valley. Whatev. I think I would have a stream and a lake too.

Then, I'd have a sweet castle with modern stuff, lighting, electricity, plumbing, running water, and all that jazz. Inside, I'd have several different motifs. But, mainly it would say, castle. One of the most important features would be a little dirt path that leads a ways off from the castle to an authentically built and styled dojo. It would be my place of training, you know, for a fight or maybe a challenge. I'd hire professionals from all my favorite styles, Taekwondo, Aikido, Brazilian jui-jitsu, Kung Fu, Kick Boxing, Kendo, and ninjitsu. These pros, as I like to call them, would all have living quarters in my castle so they could stay close by, but they would also have company cars, like corvettes, porches, and Honda Accord Hybrids to travel home at night if they wanted. Another important feature of my mansion would be the dining facilities. Basically, I'd have a team of chefs that kicked so much butt, that I'd have to be turning down presidents of countries for dinner parties, because so many would want to eat here. It would be just me and my posse.


Also, let's just say I wanted a big mac or the "college special", I'd have my own crack team of commandos comprised of Navy SEALs, Green Berets (by they way, they refer to themselves simply as "special forces"), Air force PJs, Marine scout snipers, and Delta Force operators, who'd load up in a helicopter and take off and very casually buy me my big mac and bring it back. It would be nice. As for security, I'd most likely have a team of FBI agents and CIA, and Secret Service peeps, who were dressed up as gardeners, and butlers, and cooks, and all the regular types you find in castles these days. An important note would be that they actually have the skills they are dressed up to be, because I'd need those services done.



I think one of the capstone rooms of my castle would be the game room. This would be a room so cool and decorated, that King Kong and Alice from Alice and wonderland would get married, just to show how cool this room is.

When you came to the door for the room it would be a big double door made of sold Diamond. Then, when you walked in, there would be several tables set up for warhammer, 40k, DnD, magic, and WoW and any other game that would be cool. Plus, there would be an Xbox 360 with guitar hero so we could really wail hard. i would also have a wii hooked up to a flat screen TV that was as big as one wall. That would be awesome. A great thing about this room, is it connections. It's right next to a bathroom, it's next to the snack bar, and the butler would come and see if we needed food and drink. We'd all say, "YES!!! WE NEED FOOD AND DRINK MY GOOD MAN!!!" and we'd all have a gregarious laugh, even the butler. Another cool thing would be that, the entire games workshop staff and painters would work and play there, and beta test all their ideas on us, and ask us for ideas. They'd also live in quarters if they wanted, but they wouldn't have to. In this way, there would always be someone to play a pick up game of 40k.




On the 8 story of the castle in one of the turrets there would be an armory (armory # 1) full of weapons and sniper rifles so we could practice the trade. See, a ways off there would be a bunch of targets like melons, and cans of soup to shoot at. Only, to get there, you'd have to rock climb the wall all the way to the top, but it's cool bro, cuz it would be one of those practice rock climbing walls. And, if you just got plain lazy, there would be a new rope and chandelier to use to get to the top every day. To come down, you just repel, or use the giant fire pole.









I'd have a personal room for all of you too. On a really professional looking plaque next to the door it would say, Ben's room, or Dan's and Rachel's Room, or Shebby's room, or Zachary's room, you get the picture. These rooms would be there in case you didn't want to go home after a night of DnD or a party. In fact, my castle would be situated so that it would be right next to Ben's grad school, and Dan's teaching job, and whatever base I was at. And, if you really needed to get to work fast, my personal fleet of pilots would fly you there in a SR-71 blackbird. It would be nice.





Oh, and like, the congressional library or whatever, would be re-situated to my own library, so it would be a pretty kick butt library, and we would get copies off all the new books, first. Plus, there would be motorcycles and 4 wheelers galore.





These are just some of the things off the top of my head. Keep in mind, I really don't know why I just wrote this lol. But, I think it's because I'd really like a sweet game room someday, or maybe to own a game store when I retire, or a Barnes and Nobles, or maybe a dojo.